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  • Writer's pictureMr. Pat

The Last Witch Hunter

Updated: Jul 19, 2021

The 159th review overall!

First night back on the overnights wasn’t that bad. Went to Chili’s today, also wasn’t bad. After yesterday’s movie that I wasn’t a fan of, I decided to watch the sequel...

The Last Witch Hunter (2015)

No it’s not an actual sequel, nor it is anything close The Witch, but it does make the former more enjoyable to think of it that way. Vin Diesel is a part of a group of knights or dudes that are trying to kill the Witch Queen who is responsible for The Black Plague, she wants to destroy humanity because of reasons. So Vin Diesel defeats her and in retaliation, she gives him immortality. The power doesn’t really gets explained too well, but who cares, you’re not looking for realism in this movie.

Fast forward 800 years and Diesel is now a part of a group called the Ax and Cross, and he hunts witches and imprisons them because of a truce, blah blah.

As far as the movie goes, I don’t have too many opinions on it. It’s just meh. I like Vin Diesel a lot, but this movie doesn’t know how to use its bankable star. Diesel has a certain charismatic charm about him and The Last Witch Hunter goes out of its way to hamper him. It’s so gloomy and Diesel is so serious and clinical that’s it just not fun. I mean, he’s kind of a dick to everyone (not the funny kind) and he’s so shocked when people betray him. Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters has a similar story but it’s 10 times more entertaining and fun, and even had some some scary moments and witch designs. This movie just kinda goes through the motions and doesn’t do anything to stand out, even the witch doesn’t look that cool, just looks like she fell asleep in the tanning machine.

I mean, it’s not terrible, it just doesn’t have much going for it. You know what the stakes are but you don’t really care. And they have Elijah Wood who’s just kinda there until the very end, but it’s a twist that once again you can shrug your shoulders at. The ingredients were definitely there for a better and more entertaining move, but they just sprinkled in a little too much doom and gloom that you could never have fun with the silly premise. Still much better than The Witch though.

5 Dr. Chainsaws!

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