Hokum

Mr. Pat

10 minutes ago

5 min read

I'm seeing a lot of people complaining about the no-call PI at the end of the game and how there should have been one second left on the clock during the Notre Dame game, but as a Notre Dame fan, they didn't deserve to win. Even if they would have gotten another play, Mike Denbrock probably would have called another fucking fade that hadn't been working all night. As far as rankings go, I think the Coaches Poll is a lot more accurate for Notre Dame than the AP. I could go on ranting for longer, but instead, let's discuss...

Hokum (2026)

Adam Scott plays Ohm Bauman, a writer who is trying to finish his latest book and is also a huge asshole. He is staying at a hotel in Ireland to work on the book and take care of something personal. When he gets there, he quickly picks a fight with a man with a crossbow, the owner, the manager and the bellhop. In fact, the only people that he seems to like are those that give him alcohol: a hermit, Jerry, he finds while wandering in the woods, and Fiona, the bartender. We later find out he's there to spread the ashes of two people. One of them he spreads delicately, making sure to spread it nice and even, really taking his time. For the other urn, he simply dumps it out and gives it a shake to get out any remaining ashes. So it's pretty obvious that he's dealing with something.

We later find out that his mom was murdered. She was shot in the head while coming home when Ohm was a child. When asked what happened to the killer, Ohm says nothing because he was too young and he should have been hanged. You don't quite understand at the time, but this conversation really fuels the entire movie. After the death of Ohm's mother, his father, in Ohm's words, "became a monster." That explains the lack of care when dumping out his dad's remains.

I don't want to get into too much of the plot, because the way everything comes together is very satisfying, and it makes for a better experience when you go in fresh. But here's the CliffsNotes version. While walking to his room, he sees that the honeymoon suite is completely locked up with a heavy gate, and no one's allowed in. That's because the owner says he caught a cailleach, which translates to "old woman, hag." I've seen different things about if it's a witch in Irish folklore and others saying there's a difference between the two. I don't know for certain, I guess it's up to interpretation, but for convenience's sake, I'm going to refer to her as a witch.

Through a series of actions, Ohm makes it into the honeymoon suite, and while searching for something, he gets locked inside the room. The hotel owner went through pains to make sure that room was as secure as possible, with good reason based on the story he's telling a couple of kids about what happens when you run into the witch. So if it's strong enough to hold a magical, evil creature, things are very dire for Ohm, especially if it's true that he's now trapped inside a prison with a witch.

There was plenty to like about this movie, but what made it really stand out to me were the side characters. They weren't super interesting, scene-stealing, or standout, but they were perfectly complementary pieces. Everything they did fit the story and moved the plot along organically. Ohm is an American traveling to Ireland for the first time, so he's clueless about the place. Each character either gives him valuable information, helps him along the way or becomes a major plot point. You just don't realize it at the time because it's not shoehorned in, and everyone's role materializes as the movie goes on.

There's one character that plays, I guess he's head of security, and when you first meet him, he had just finished killing a goat with a crossbow. You find out he does it because the goats like to stand on the cars and scratch the paint, and rich guests don't like goat hoof scratches on their BMWs. Every time you see him, he seems like slightly less of an asshole than Ohm, and you assume he's going to be an antagonist, but his character isn't really good or bad; he's just doing his job. I could go more into him, but I don't want to give it away. As I marinate on the movie, I find myself liking the character more and more. He's not caught up in the goings-on; he's just doing his job, and he has little patience for tomfoolery.

I think my favorite character was Jerry. He's a homeless man who lives in the woods outside the hotel. He's harmless, but he's a bit of a nuisance for the business because he looks and smells like ass, and he comes in a lot to warm himself by the fire. The staff tells you he lives alone because he killed his wife and hid out in the woods to avoid the police. But while they're not his biggest fans, they don't really try to get rid of him, not until they think he was behind a kidnapping. Despite looking, and probably smelling like shit from living out in the woods, he was probably the most "normal" person in the whole movie, except for maybe Fiona.

Another thing I loved was that the movie takes its time. It's not a slow burn, because once things happen, things keep happening to keep you hooked and it doesn't take a super long time to get there. There's a very jarring scene in the first act, and that's where the movie picks up. Still, it's very understated. It's not so much scary, but it keeps an eerie vibe throughout the whole thing. You don't really get a good look at the witch, and she picks her spots to show, and the scene where you first see her is spectacularly creepy. Seeing her climb up the elevator shaft is awesomely scary; it really gives you an "Oh shit" moment where you feel scared for Ohm. What makes her so effective is that, if I had to guess, she has about two minutes of screen time, but you know she's there, just out of sight, watching. Her presence hovers over the movie the entire time he's stuck in that room.

I talked about what I liked; here's what I loved. The dialogue is great. It's not Quentin Tarantino with the clever wordplay or intriguing conversations; it's got that Shaun of the Dead/Hot Fuzz dialogue where there are seemingly throwaway lines, but they pay off down the line. Another thing I loved, and I'm trying to word it in a way that doesn't give anything away because it's a major plot point, is that we see the last moments of his mom's life, and it is absolutely devastating. What she was trying to convey in her final moments; heart breaking. Then at the end, it pays off in a way that is truly heartfelt.

Speaking of the end, the movie begins with us seeing the ending of the book play out as he's writing it. There's a discussion later where he's telling Fiona what he's written, and she's not a fan. Then when we get to the very end, we see how the ending has changed, and it's such a satisfying way to end this very unique movie.

I struggled with this rating a lot. As I was writing this review, it seemed like I was convincing myself this should be a 10, but in the moment while watching it never flirted with the lofty 10 Dr. Chainsaws. Still, I thought it was wonderful and well worth your time!