The 307th review!
Earlier this month I watched and reviewed A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy’s Revenge. Those of you who remember, I didn’t think too highly of it and actually got some pushback on it, people telling me it’s better than I gave it credit for and that it’s much better than part six. I hadn’t seen part six in probably around two decades. But I remember loving it and it’s probably the movie I rented most from my local Family Video. Today I wanted to see if that movie holds up and I checked out...
Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991). Rented on Amazon Prime, not a video store.
I’m going to start off this review by admitting this a bad movie. The acting is bad, the characters are unbelievable and everything about it is stupid, literally nothing about this movie works. But I love it. Watching it back, it’s so much worse than I remembered, but man it’s great.
The movie begins by telling you what you’re about to see takes place 10 years from now. This movie came out in ‘91, but they meant 10 years from the events of Dream Child, not 10 years from the movie’s release date, which would make more sense, so it takes in 1999. During that time Freddy has successfully managed to murder every child and teenager in Springwood, Ohio. Overcome with grief, the people of the town have all lost their minds, but we don’t get much time exploring that aspect. In the meantime, Freddy has been getting bored, so he manages to get a teenaged John Doe to unwittingly do his bidding and bring Freddy to a new place that he can terrorize.
This is the movie where they dropped all pretenses of Freddy being scary. The first time you see him, he’s dressed as the Wicked Witch of the West, flying on a broomstick and telling someone, “I’ll get you my pretty, and your little soul too!” And believe it or not, that’s not the craziest moment in this movie!
The John Doe eventually gets taken to a rundown shelter outside Springwood where we meet the only other people who matter; a psychiatrist, a doctor, a stoner played by Breckin Meyer making his film debut, a kid with a hearing aid and a really angry teen named Tracy who hates being touched or talked to. There’s not much chemistry between them because Tracy is busy yelling at everyone and they don’t seem to particularly like being around each other. We’re treated to some weird Freddy shenanigans but things really go off the wall once they end up back at Springwood. Their car ride did lead to one of my most rewound moments of all time, they’re completely lost and one of the kids, Carlos, has fallen asleep while Tracy angrily demands the map. When he tries to give it to her, it keeps growing and eventually he sees two words written on a section of it, ‘You’re fucked.’
Tracy by this point is super annoyed and yells for the map, waking Carlos up. He stares for a second and fires back, “Well the map says we’re fucked!” It’s really a perfect moment.
I mentioned earlier how the town is crazy, and when they roll up on the town fair everyone stares. At one point we get Roseanne Barr and Tom Arnold in cameo roles to go along with Alice Cooper and Johnny Depp’s short scenes. Depp and Cooper I get. Depp’s first role was in the original and Cooper is an icon and a big fan of the series. But Roseanne and Tom Arnold? Then we go to the school where a teacher is teaching an empty classroom Freddy facts, like “1493, Freddy sailed across the sea.”
After more hijinx they end up in the former home of Nancy Thompson, and that’s when things get weird. I don’t want to give too much away, but the stoner, Spencer, gets sucked into a video game by Freddy, who then makes several unapproved Nintendo references including the “Power Glove” if any of you are old enough to remember that. Sadly, that never fails to get a laugh out of me.
I should hate this movie but I just can’t bring myself to do it. Freddy is just so much fun in it. He’s wiped out the entire kid population of a whole town and when you’ve killed that many people with so much power at your disposal, I can see an entity like him having a desire to play with his victims more. There’s more to the movie and they do give you a little more backstory than any of the others movie did, but it’s nothing special. With this one, you’re here for the slapstick.
This movie is bad, yes, but it could have been worse. Peter Jackson, from Lord of the Rings wrote a draft for this movie that was rejected. In his script, Freddy was weak, so for kicks, the teenagers of Springwood would have drug slumber parties, enter the dream world and beat up Freddy. As crazy as this movie ended up, I think Jackson’s version would have been worse.
Sue me, but I still like this movie a lot more than I should. It doesn’t take itself seriously at all, but it’s still fun and follow the rules set forth in the original. There were multiple moments in this movie that made me laugh out loud because it’s just so ridiculous. I have to imagine Robert Englund had fun doing this movie. Plus, Carlos’ death is his favorite in the entire series.
The movie was billed as the “Final Nightmare,” but that lasted three years when New Nightmare came along and made Freddy scary again followed by Freddy vs. Jason that went back to a more funny and menacing monster. It’s a bad movie and I think if you don’t have fond memories of this one, you won’t like it. But you know what? It’s a whole lot of stupid fun!
7 Dr. Chainsaws
Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare
Directed by Rachel Talalay
1991
R
English
89 min
In this sixth return to the horrifying world of Nightmare on Elm Street, the town of Springwood decides to forever end Freddy Krueger's deadly hold on their dreams. Freddy finally confronts the one person he has never been able to defeat, a psychologist who now learns the source of her lifelong nightmares--Freddy's daughter--in Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare. Cast: Robert Englund, Lisa Zane, Shon Greenblatt, Lezlie Deane, Ricky Logan
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