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  • Writer's pictureMr. Pat

13 Fanboy

Last night I worked 12:30 PM - 11:30 PM and today I worked 7:00 AM - 6:00 PM. I am so exhausted and I spent most of the day in a fog. Thankfully I don't have any more of these short turnarounds on my schedule for the year and I'm hoping it stays that way! Anyways, let's talk about...

13 Fanboy (2021)

The 352 Review

As the stupid lawsuit still lingers (man I am REALLY tired of writing that every October) Friday the 13th remains in Limbo. That means all we get are fan films that range from great to yikes. But today's movie found a way around it and did something pretty interesting.

It follows around the actors and actresses playing fictionalized versions of themselves as a stalker starts to kill off final girls from the franchise. I loved the premise and it was really cool seeing Kane Hodder, CJ Graham, Lar Park Lincoln, Dee Wallace, Judie Aronson and others all on screen together. There was even Corey Feldman playing a skeezy movie producer. Think Harvey Weinstein if he didn't have the power to play with people's careers. I have to commend the makers of this movie for getting all the people together for this film. As cool as it is, I still feel a little uncomfortable watching it considering Adrienne King (Alice from the first movie) dealt with a stalker who did similar things that the killer in this one did and at one point broke into her home and put a gun to her head. I can imagine that's why she's not in this.

As cool as the premise is, the movie is stupid. I don't know how to explain it but at times I would think to myself, "This is so stupid!" At one point I thought I was nearing what I thought was the end, so I checked to see how much time was left and I was shocked/angry that only an hour had passed and I still had 40 minutes left! The movie tries to be a mystery and introduces red herrings to make you think they might be the killer, but it's waaaaay too obvious, like the movie is pushing your head against the screen and yelling at you, "DO YOU SEE HOW SNEAKY THIS GUY LOOKS?! HE SURE SEEMS SUSPICIOUS, HUH?!"

They introduce a creepy janitor who leers at our main character and then glares at her bf and creepily calls her his best friend. That one scene is the only time you see him in the entire movie. Then they clearly want you to think the bf is the killer but he gets hand waved away and doesn't play a part in the finale. I watched this movie and I'm wracking my brain trying to think of when we last saw him and I can't remember. I don't even know if he survived, that's how forgettable he was.

One thing the movie does right is the identity of one of the killers. As he gives his motivations and you realize who he is, it actually makes a lot of sense. Plus, the killer is a big, strong baddie so it makes sense he's able to hold his own against the actors who played Jason. Unlike Scream 5 when Dewey should have been able to lift the killer with one arm. But I digress, I'm not bitter or anything.

Speaking of the Jason actors, they got my two favorites, Kane Hodder and CJ Graham playing themselves. I really liked the camaraderie they had with each other while at the conventions. It was fun seeing them all hanging out.

The final showdown is a curious choice because it involves Graham, not Hodder, fighting the Fanboy. I call it curious because as great as CJ Graham is/was as Jason, he's not going to be the one who most people think of when someone mentions Jason. Hodder played the masked killer in four movies and is synonymous with the character. During the final fight the baddie is saying things like the fight is the biggest honor of his life. I mean, you just fought Kane Hodder a few scenes ago! Although watching CJ Graham scream, "YOU WANT A SHOT AT THE TITLE?!" made me smile.

Even after that fight the movie manages another surprise and I thought it wasn't bad although I don't buy the hero moment. Still, it was fun watching her annihilate the baddie. I loved the effort the movie made and like I said, it's impressive they got so many Friday the 13th actors and actresses. But it's just not a very good movie and it really drags in the middle section and I couldn't get into it until CJ Graham started throwing down.

5 Dr. Chainsaws!

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